First Day of School, First Day of School!

Hey guys.  It's me, Kj.

So, I just finished my second week of school.  It's been fun... ish.  Actually, I'm really happy to be back.  I like seeing people and being in cheer.  It's just that I don't super enjoy sitting through lectures.  Snacks are my heaven-send.  As in I cannot make it through a lecture without snacks.  Do you know how fast a pack of gummies runs out?!  Faster than a professor can say, "When I was your age.."

Anyway, this post is about the first day of school.  I asked my dad what I should wear on said day, and he said that it should be cute because first impressions matter.  Well, Dad, I can't say I agree with you completely.  And here's why.  Stick with me here.

So, you're sitting in class on the first day, and what's the first thing you do?  Hopefully you take off your backpack and sit down.  But after that, you scout out the prospects.  Let me help you ladies out:

Steps to scouting out prospects on the first day of school:

1. Eliminate the girls. (If that doesn't apply to you, then... yeah...)
2. Check who is cute.
3. Make a mental note.

Now, this may seem shallow and such, but how the heck are you supposed to judge a person's "personality" on the first day??  Unfortunately, people don't have soul charts floating above their head.  Life would be so easy if that was the case.

Ok, anyway, the point is: how many of us actually remember any person we loved on the first day? I don't.  But, as the semester goes on, I start figuring out who is in my classes, I notice people I didn't see before, and then I actually take note of certain people.

So here's what it comes down to:  This ^ thought process should be true for everyone because I usually think the best.  And, if it is true for everyone, then yes, first impressions matter for the scouting prospects part.  But chances are those who made a note of you will forget about exactly how you looked on that first day and will continually notice you throughout semester.

Then maybe you should look ugly on the first day?  Welllll, not ugly, but not super cute.  Just regular.  And then look REALLY cute in later days/weeks because then they'll be like, "where have you been all of semester??"And then you've got them.

Just remember that at that point, people really do start noticing personality.  So if that's a problem for you, maybe skip the shopping trip altogether and go to a niceness seminar instead.  I bet you $100 BYU offers those.

Ok, choose the right, people!  And remember, the first day is already past, so you can't use this post as an excuse to look regular.  Unless it's hobo day-- when there's no time between practice and class, so you go in your sweats.  That is an exception because I named it.

Love, Kj

Bred for skills in magic.

Kj  has returned!  Sorry about that, bee tee dubs.  I won't let it happen again.


I have a favorite animal.  It's a squirrel.  I can't remember how that happened, but it's been true since I was about 12.


In other news, one time I went to the zoo.  And then, I saw my second favorite animal.  A squirrel monkey! I bet you ten billion dollars that you didn't know that existed.  Well that's okay because we're all pretty dumb until we discover things.  And the day I discovered the squirrel monkey was a joyous occasion.  Here's some pics.

As you can tell, the connection was instantaneous.  He literally came right to me.  I named him omelet.


While we're on the subject, my third favorite animal is a group of animals: albinos.  Albino people are cool, and I have indeed met a few in my lifetime. But, albino animals are cooler.  One day in 2010 I decided to make an albino squirrel my profile picture.  No, I wasn't 10, I was actually 15, but I'm not ashamed of it.  Here's a screen shot for proof.

Last, my fourth favorite animal is also a group of animals: pygmys.  Pygmy squirrels are freaking cute. You can get on google rampages looking up pygmy animals.  So google at your own risk.


Alright, I'm so glad you're all enlightened on my animal preferences.  I try to keep it at 4, but you never know when a new one will fall into your life. As Emily Osment would say, keep your e-eyes open.  Actually that's Taylor Swift, but same difference.  At least I didn't say Hannah Montana.


Love, Kj

3 D's: Duck. Dynasty. Dream.

Today was the season 3 premier of Duck Dynasty.  And I LOVE duck dynasty.  I may or may not be considered a bandwagon fan.  But I'm okay with that because it is such frappin' hilarious show!  I also feel that I hopped on the bandwagon a little earlier than most, so at least I got a good seat, right?

This is just one of far too many wonderful Duck Dynasty quotes.  If it were one movie, I would have the whole thing memorized.  Sure, it can be quite scripted, and Willie is not a good enough actor for that, but Si is just funny and borderline senile.  I mean, the man mistook berries for poop!  HE ATE POOP!  Plus, he is a Nam vet, for crying out loud.  Give him some R-S-P-E-C-T!!  And let's not forget to mention the time he dominated the donut-eating contest!  Did Obama ever win a donut eating contest?  Did Justin Bieber?  Did Adele?  I don't think so. . . Ok, maybe Adele did.

ANYWAY. . .

Over MLK day break, I had a dream about Duck Dynasty.

The best part is that I was in the dream. . . As in I was a member of the Robertson family!  I'm not positive how I fit in, but I think I was a grandchild.  Which was sweet!  I mean, Phil was my grandpa, guys!

Anyway, I think we were eating squirrel.

THEN, WE WENT TO DISNEYLAND!!

Is that not the greatest imaginary experience of your whole life?! If I ever get a terminal illness and get a wish, I will for sure (1) meet Tim Tebow (just thought I'd throw that in there), (2) become adopted into the Robertson family, and then (3) go to Disneyland with them.

That would make me happy, happy, happy.


Love, Kj

Valentine's Day

In case you walked around campus with your eyes closed and headphones in all day, I’ll just take a moment to inform you that today is Valentine’s Day.  I’ll also take a moment to advise you to refrain from walking around campus in the manner described above.  Safety hazard. 

Here’s my thing:  I hate haters.  I mean, what’s wrong with being “just okay”, “just eh”, “just fine” with JB, the Jonas Brothers, T Swift, etc.? You don’t know their lives. The same goes for Christmas music and Valentine's Day.  So many people LOATHE ENTIRELY things/people that are completely irrelevant.  The only things you can acceptably hate are: haters, the Chargers (and the Cowboys, and the Patriots, and the Raiders, and the Chiefs), and the Utes.  That’s it.  If you’re hating anything else, then you’re just crusty and making your life stink.  

So Valentine’s Day is cool.  I mean, do I have a Valentine?  No.  Can I walk anywhere at BYU and avoid being reminded of that?  Heck no.  However, I like love.  Love’s cool.  I also love pink. And candy.  So that makes for a happy day.  And every holiday is an excuse to celebrate, which is super great.  

Furthermore, I like the cheesy stuff people do.  Mormons do cheesy best.  Some lady who looked like she belonged on Yo Gabba Gabba came and sang a song to a kid in the Wilk today.  She was nuts.  And whoever thought it was a cute idea to do that to their sweetheart is more nuts.  But it made my day a little more interesting.  In the “I could’ve probably gone throughout my day having not seen that, and it would’ve been better” sense.  But, better is not always memorable.

So quit hating on Valentine’s Day.  Hey, if you have a Valentine, pin a rose on your nose.  If not, that may be a sign you could do your hair a little cuter. Or perhaps you smell bad. Joke.  Then again, I could very well not be joking.  Who knows?

Anyway, I’ll leave you with this meme because it's punny.

Just remember:  Chances are, I love you.  So you’ve made it.  You’re there.  Happy Valentine’s Day, homies!  And stay away from the Hinckley Hall lobby tonight.  The PDA could be toxic.

Love, Kj

Chronic Ankle Instability

In case you didn't know from my title, my topic of the day is Chronic Ankle Instability, from which I suffer.  Don’t try and wikipedia it... you’ll fail.

What is CAI, you ask?  Well, 6 months ago I would’ve been just as naive as you. But I’m older now, and quite a bit wiser.  Six months older, actually.  

Let me tell you a little story.  It takes place at cheer camp in July 2012.  I fell from a pyramid and severely sprained my left ankle.  (See Figure 1).  That meant I got to hop around Vegas for 2 days.  They don’t have crutches in Vegas because (a) they like when people suffer,and (b) lots of people walk with a limp to up their swag.  Not me.  I just hopped/ mooched piggy back rides off teammates.  

Figure 1

First Sprain.  Days 1, 3, and 4.

Less than three months later, on October 24, 2012, my life was changed forever.  Following another fall and another ankle sprain (see Figure 2), this time on my right ankle, I was diagnosed with CAI.  When I received the news, I was devastated.  So many questions ran through my mind: What did this mean?  How long did I have?  A week?  A year or two?  

Figure 2

Second sprain.  Days 1 and 4.

The answer? One month.  Just a short 4 weeks later, I re-sprained my left ankle at another practice (see Figure 3).  

Figure 3

Third Sprain.  Day 1... I was done with the bruise pics at this point.

Though this one was not as bad as the others due to the daily ankle taping Jun advised, I was nevertheless devastated.  My diagnosis was confirmed.  I had come to terms with the fact that I have little ankles. Correction: I had little ankles (see comparison of Figure 4).  They are now kankles.  Which is sad because my little ankles were quite attractive.  

Figure 4

Left: ankle pre-sprains.  Right:  wrapped up ankle post-sprain.

Now, maybe I can clear up some ambiguity by giving you a “Day in the life of a CAI sufferer.”

 I wake up at 6:30, and Jun tapes the crap out of my ankles before I go to cheer practice.  This makes for really ugly arabesques and kicks due to my very limited ability to point my toes. 

 Anyway, then I face my abusive relationship: cheer.  Man, I really REALLY love it!  But as you can see, sometimes cheer doesn’t reciprocate that love.  But I’m sticking with it.  We’re going to work it out.  

After practice, I cut off my tape, which hurts if I haven’t shaved in a while.  Then I try and get the weird sticky spray stuff off because it makes it difficult to put pants on when your ankles are sticky.  

Throughout my day, I go through unforeseen complications associated with CAI.  These include: not being able to freely parkour, avoiding potholes and curbs, jumping really low when I frolick, looking weird when I go down stairs, occasionally receiving an ankle "massage" that makes me cry, and struggling to take get my boots over my kankles.  

If that night entails a game, I again tape like there’s no tomorrow.  Often with 2 different trainers taping different ankles, the left and right don’t quite match up (see Figure 5).  But that’s okay because we draw Nike swooshes on the sides and pretend I’m just a hipster and wear tube socks when I cheer.  I’m not sure which is more embarrassing... 

Figure 5

Just... yep.

Life’s rough.  I get through it one day at a time.  

But the my kankles don’t define me.  My CAI doesn’t define me.  All I ask is that you join me in the fight.  Let’s search for the cure (I propose metal joints).  Let’s spread awareness. My fight will not be in vain.  

To help the cause, all I ask is that you give me $5.  Or a back scratch.

Love, "Kankle Kj"

Happy Birthday Ma!!!

Today is my wonderful mom's birthday!!! I can honestly say she's the best mom ever.  Sorry to all you other people out there who have moms.  But I guess we can't all be this lucky.
I've come up with a few things I have learned from my mama, which I thought I would share.


#1- Cleanliness is next to godliness.  My mom has always kept our house spotless.  I seriously don't know how she does it.  But it makes for a wonderful environment to play, learn and relax in.

#2- It's okay to listen to a song or watch a movie over and over.  Hey, if you like it, go for it!  This is the main reason I had several Journey, Depeche Mode, Erasure, Bryan Adams, and Celine Dion songs (as well as the entire Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie) memorized at a young age.  I know this habit drives my dad nuts, but I have found that I'm on Mom's side with this one.  I am definitely a song replayer.

#3- Put the gospel first, and everything else will fall into place.  My mom has a knack for letting unimportant things go.  She simplifies her life to just what is good.  And that's all she (and anyone in this world) needs.

#4- Family first.  Mom always says that.  And more so, she lives it.  She has stayed at home and taken care of us kids since stinky Kyle came into this world.  And I do not know how she is sane, with such a job.

 #5- There is no greater compliment than "you look/ act/ are just like your mom." First, glad I look like you and not dad.  Second, I seem to get told all of the above a lot more as I get older. That's just fine by me.  If I'm half the mom you are when I have kiddos, then I will have succeeded.

This is my mom.. with my dad.  See how cute?!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!  I love you!!

Love, Kj

Today is the birthday of Douglas.

DJ,

You better feel great that you got a blog shout out.

And for all who are interested, his blog is funny and great.

Yep.  And sorry about the appearance... it's finals week, so I gave up on important stuff.... like doing my hair and wearing normal people clothes.

Also, Kalli totally lied to me.  DJ's birthday is actually the 11th.  Oh well.  By now, you are reading this on (or after) his actual birthday.

Love, Kj